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Prison Pick Up Lines



"Damn, you are sexy in stripes."

"Is that a zip-gun carefully carved out of a piece of discarded metal found on the floor of the prison license-plate manufacturing shop in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?"

"You know, normally I don't give in the first 30 seconds, but I guess I'm a sucker for sheer muscle mass."

"Nice teeth. They'd look so much better on my the floor of my cell."

"Who wants to marry a multiple murderer?"

"I've been watching you from across the yard for awhile now, and I knew if I didn't work up the courage to just walk over here and ask you to be my bitch, I might regret it for the rest of my life."

"Hold still while I staple this centerfold to the back of your head."

"Did you order the Soap Drop soup?"

"That orange jumpsuit really brings out the red in your freshly-healed knife wound."

"Care to give Prisoner Johnson a weekend furlough?"

"You're new here... let me debrief you and introduce you to the penal system."

"You look even better in person than you did on America's Most Wanted."

"If looks could kill, you'd get 25 to life."

"Is your name 'Escape Tunnel'? Because I've been digging you all night."