| Q: |
What's the worst part about seeing 5 lawyers in Cadillac go
over a cliff? |
| A: |
A Cadillac seats six |
 |
| Q: |
Sadam Housain and a lawyer are buried neck deep in sand, who do
you kick in the teeth first?? |
| A: |
Housain, Business before pleasure |
| |
| Q: |
Why don't lawyers go to the beach? |
| A: |
Cats keep trying to bury them in the sand. |
| |
| Q: |
What's the difference between a female attorney and a pit bull? |
| A: |
Lipstick |
| |
| Q: |
What's black and brown and looks good on an attorney? |
| A: |
A Doberman |
| |
| Q: |
What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement? |
| A: |
Not enough cement. |
| |
| Q: |
What's the difference between a porcupine and a Porsche with
two lawyers riding in it? |
| A: |
A porcupine has pricks on the outside. |
| |
| Q: |
What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? |
| A: |
An offer you can't understand. |
| |
| Q: |
What is the definition of a lawyer? |
| A: |
A mouth with a life-support system. |
| |
| Q: |
What do you get if you put 100 lawyers in your basement? |
| A: |
A whine cellar. |
| |
| Q: |
Why is an avocado like a lawyer? (both are "avocat" in French) |
| A: |
Both have hearts like stones. |
| |
| Q: |
Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons? |
| A: |
If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched
during a campaign, they can rarely be recalled. And when they land,
they screw up everything forever. |
| Q: |
Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses? |
| A: |
From chasing parked ambulances. |
| |
| Q: |
Where can you find a good lawyer? |
| A: |
In the cemetary |
| |
| Q: |
What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo? |
| A: |
A gigolo only screws one person at a time. |
| |
| Q: |
What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire? |
| A: |
A vampire only sucks blood at night. |
| |
| Q: |
Why to lawyers wear neckties? |
| A: |
To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins. |
| |
| Q: |
What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster? |
| A: |
When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance. |
| |
| Q: |
How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb? |
| A: |
Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant. |
